- Never rush Tivar when he's carrying a dagger.
- Never parry with your face.
- Decadence is its own reward.
- There can never be too many chocolate chips. (Although there can be too little cookie dough.)
- There will always be some people who can do some things on the field that you just can't. Don't worry about it, work on your basics and have some double-stuff Oreos.
- Always remember that your opponent on the field today may be standing behind you with a polearm tomorrow. Conduct yourself accordingly.
- Snorkels are always optional. (See Don Iolo for details.)
- If it is time to serve dinner, the meeting is adjourned.
- Someone who disagrees with you is not necessarily your enemy. Someone who agrees with you is not necessarily your friend.
- Don't be stupid.